We have the best Kris Kringle gifts you can buy
We’ve taken some of the biggest Secret Santa gifts and corrupted the hell out of them with inappropriate memes, celebrities, quotes, and more. You can find the following product types in our collection of Kris Kringle gifts:
T-shirts
Christmas is a scorcher in Australia, and if we have to wear clothes, let them be t-shirts with ridiculous things printed on them. When your Secret Santa settles down in the afternoon to watch The Empire Strikes Back for the millionth time, they’ll definitely want to be wearing our Yoda-themed Christmas t-shirt. Definitely.
Tanks
Like a t-shirt but with the arms torn off. Even better and cooler, which is why we sell so many of them. Your Secret Santa’s pits deserve to be as sweat free as possible. Fans of The Simpsons will love our D’oh Ho Ho version.
Hoodies
If you live somewhere a little more chilled like SA or Tassie, your Secret Santa might want to chuck a hoodie on instead, especially if they wake up at the crack of dawn on Christmas day like an excited 4-year old. They can chuck on that hoodie and continue tearing open their presents.
Crop Tops
One for the ladies. Who doesn’t want to look sexy and funny at the same time (particularly in our Cookies for Santa top).They’re fashionable, made from high-quality fabrics, and your Secret Santa will love them.
Mugs
In terms of Secret Santa gift ideas, mugs the classic Christmas gift! We couldn’t survive without our morning caffeine, which is why we have created plenty of naughty designs to give your Secret Santa a chuckle before being smashed with energy. You’ll find Will Ferrell’s Elf, Kevin McCallister, Samuel L.Jackson, and plenty of other celebs on our mugs. You can even get a personalised mug with your Secret Santa’s face on it. Bonza!
Stubby Holders
men should abide by one ironclad rule: keep your beer cold at all times. And our stubby holders are great for Secret Santa presents. they get a laugh, that’s a bonus! They can chuck their beer into it and then slide into the pool like some kind of drunk elephant seal. Just warn them not to squash your youngest.
Cards
You won’t find any pleasant nativity scenes here. Our Christmas cards are just as inappropriate as the rest of our stuff. There’s the classic council worker who wants you to get a VB up ya, encouraging messages inviting you to get into the Christmas spirits, Kath & Kim wishing you a noice Christmas, and more. We love them!
Calendars
A new year is almost upon us, so the old calendar needs to be torn down and replaced with a newer, funnier one. You wouldn’t want your dates to get mixed up would you? And with our Animals calendar, you’ll be able to view the love all year round!
Prank Cards
Can you imagine how annoying it would be to receive a musical card that doesn’t stop when you close it? Then when you break the bloody thing, it blasts you with a shower of sparkling glitter? Well, we sell this very thing. It’s perfect for people who are more than a little devilish and who enjoy mildly tormenting their loved ones. That’s you, right?
Soap
Liven up your holiday showers with a soap bar that wishes you a merry fucking Christmas. Oh, and if you’re reading this in December—merry fucking Christmas! 🎄
Our Secret Santa gift ideas suit everyone
We created our inappropriate Christmas gifts because we want Xmas day to be a bit more fun. If laughter is the best medicine, our products are a bloody prescription for your friends and family. You can give a rude stubby cooler to your Dad, a Kath & Kim crop top to your sister, a get into the Christmas (boozy) spirits” mug to your bro, and a lovely new “dogs pooping in beautiful places” calendar to your mum, who can hang it proudly on the back of a cupboard door.
Our products aren’t just made to be funny and rude, they’re useful too—we aren’t just about creating tat that you will laugh at once and then throw away. In terms of Secret Santa gifts in Australia, our products are made from high quality ceramics, cotton, cards, and other materials that last for ages, and that you can use again and again. You’ll be able to pull out your Steve Irwin Christmas t-shirt every bloody year, while slurping coffee out of your “Birthday Boy” Jesus mug. Laughs all around!
Why buy one of our funny Secret Santa gifts?
If you’re still not sure about whether to buy one of our funny Secret Santa gifts, maybe we can convince you. These are some important reasons why you should definitely definitely buy one for your Kris Kringle choice:
1. We’re hilarious
Our crack squad of very talented baboons craft all our designs in house, making the most of their skills in memes, pop culture references, and bad dad jokes (the best dad joke is a bad dad joke). We’re here to take a walk on the spicier side of life, with an irreverent sense of humour that you and your dad are gonna love! Can’t say the same for everyone else in the family, but there’s no accounting for taste, is there?
2. They’re Funny
Look, we don’t want to labour the point, but our Secret Santa gifts are pretty bloody funny. And that makes you funny by association. Seriously though, it’s a tough world out there and we could all do with more of a laugh. It relieves stress, relaxes your muscles, improves your immune system, relieves pain…this is all scientifically proven. By giving your Secret Santa one of our funny gifts, you’re actually improving their health in some small way—no joke!
3. They Last
we aren’t about making cheap crap. All of our products—including our Kris Kringle gift ideas—are made from high grade, durable materials that last for years, because we want people to enjoy them for as long as possible. That means quality cotton, ceramics, neoprene for our stubbie coolers, card for our novelty cards and calendars, and soap that actually cleans you.
4. They’re Useful
Our products are designed to make you laugh, but that isn’t all they’re good for. Our clothes can be worn throughout the entire year, our stubby coolers are obviously good for whenever you want to cool your booze, our mugs can become a regular home for your caffeine, etc. etc.
5. They’re Good Value For Money
You can’t put a price on humour. Well in our case you can, and the price is good for the quality you get. We certainly could make t-shirts for $10, but they’d probably fall apart after a few washes and the last thing we want is to be labelled as grifters. We choose quality instead, and that’s why we have so many loyal customers.
6. We’re Australian-Owned & Operated
It’s good to support Aussie businesses because it boosts our economy, and we are proud to call ourselves one. Our headquarters are in Woolloongabba (Brisbane), but we essentially ship to every corner of the country. As the Americans like to say, you’ll be a good patriot by supporting us.
7. You Can Rewatch The Clips, Shows, Movies
We stock an awesome range of funny secret Santa gifts in Australia. Need proof? Our Mike Tyson t-shirt might encourage you to chuck on his bitey showdown with Evander Holyfield. Our Elf tanks might remind you to put on what is possibly the greatest Christmas movie of all time. Or maybe you’re a Die Hard fan instead, and our John McClane t-shirt will inspire you to watch the entire 4-part series back to back. What else is there to do during the holiday season?
What sizes are your Secret Santa presents?
Most of our Secret Santa presents (like our mugs, stubby holders, etc.) are
one-size-fits-all, but our clothing obviously comes in different sizes, and they are as
follows:
Men’s t-shirts— S, M, L, XL, 2XL, 3XL, 4XL, 5XL
Women’s t-shirts— XS, S, M, L, XL
Women’s crop top— XS, S, M, L, XL
Tank top— S, M, L, XL, 2XL
Unisex hoodie— S, M, L, XL, 2XL, 3XL
NEW! Toddler T-Shirts— 2T, 3T, 4T, 5T, 6T
NEW! Youth T-Shirts— XS, S, M, L, XL
Check out our range of Secret Santa gifts in Australia
If you’re lost for Kris Kringle gift ideas, we have some of the funniest, rudest, and inappropriate presents you’ll find. Be a mischievous devil this Christmas and get your Secret Santa one of our awesome pressies. They’ll love it!
What are Secret Santa and Kris Kringle gift ideas?
If you’ve been lampooned into Secret Santa gifting and you’re not sure what the hell it is, let us explain for you.
Secret Santa is a Christmas tradition where people in a group (usually families or co-workers) put their names into a hat, and then pick a name from the hat who they have to buy a present for. They can’t tell anyone else who they have picked, and whoever has your name can’t tell you either. That’s the secret part of it, you see. When you wrap up the present for your Secret Santa, you write “To Bob, from Santa” so that it remains a mystery. Technically it should forever remain a mystery even after the present has been given, but it doesn’t really matter if you tell someone that you bought their present for them. The world isn’t going to bloody end. You might also want some kudos for buying one of our hilarious gifts 😉
Where did Secret Santa gifts come from?
These things are never easy to pin down, but the tradition of Secret Santa gifts is believed to have started with Larry Dean Stewart, an American philanthropist who came up with the idea of giving people anonymous cash gifts during the holidays. For over 25 years, Stewart donated $100 bills to needy people living in his city of Kansas, and his identity wasn’t revealed until 2006. He even started training other secret Santas, who he gave $65,000 to hand out over Christmas. What an absolute legend.
Of course, that would be too simple though. Even recent traditions are difficult to trace back to their roots. Other sources believe that Secret Santa comes from Scandinavia (Julklapp), where people left anonymous Kris Kringle gifts outside others’ houses, knocking on their doors and then running away. At the end of the day—does it really matter? The tradition of Secret Santa is an excellent one, and we are proud to make it a little more amusing with our troves of funny gifts.
What is Secret Santa called in other countries?
Kris Kringle (or Kris Kindle, Kris Kringel)
Kris Kringle comes from the German word Christkindl (“Christ child”), and the game of Secret Santa is sometimes called this in Australia, Canada, America, the UK, and some other places.
Wichteln
”Witcteln” is the German word for goblin or elf, which is thought to be the creature that leaves the present for you.
Julklapp
”Julklapp” is the Scandinavian word for Secret Santa, and translates to “Christmas knock.” Pretty literal if you ask us.
Lootjes Trekken (or namen trekken)
This is the Dutch version of the game, which means “to pull straws.”
White Elephant or Dirty Santa
This is a version of the game where you can steal other people’s presents after you open yours. Instead of buying a present for a particular person, you just buy one present and put it into the pile. Then people’s names are drawn from a hat, and they get to open a present, and then swap it for someone else’s present if they want. The goal of this game is to come dead last so that you can steal whatever present you want. It’s mean and can be a lot of fun!
Secrete Santa
A very niche version of the game played with medical staff in sexual health clinics. Just kidding, we made that up.
How to run a Kris Kringle gifts game
Running a Kris Kringle game is a piece of cake. Just follow these instructions and you’re
good to go:
1. Ask everyone to write their name on a scrap of paper.
2. Tell them to chuck their names into a hat. This could be a baseball cap, a top
hat—anything you like. Can be a bowl too.
3. Shuffle the names around a bit.
4. Ask people to draw a name out of the hat one by one. If they pick their own, tell them to
put it back and pick another. Keep going until all names are drawn.
The game obviously doesn’t work if you have odd numbers because some poor sod won’t get a present. Or you can be a kind organiser and just buy the odd person a present yourself. Problem solved!
When wrapping their presents, tell people to put “To [person’s name] from Santa.” Then when it’s time to open, all you have to do is locate the presents that are from Santa and hand them out.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. Can I return my Kris Kringle gift?
You certainly can return your gift, but it must be within 14 days of purchase. You’ll just need to give us your order number or name, and return the product in the exact same condition that it was sent. We obviously can’t refund gifts that have been damaged, written in, or soiled in any way. Soiled. Yuck.
There may be instances where we can offer you a partial refund, so if you’re unsure for your
particular product, please get in touch and we’ll clarify for you.
2. What are your shipping times?
We have two primary shipping times for our orders, one regular, one fast:
Standard post—this arrives within 4-8 business days, plus 1-3 business days for order processing.
Express post—this arrives within 2-3 business days, plus 1-3 business days for order processing.
Christmas is a busy time for us, so there may be some very short delays in our shipping times over December. So we strongly recommend buying your Kris Kringle gifts early to avoid
disappointment.
3. Can I collect my order instead of having it shipped?
You’re on a budget and don’t have a lot of cash to splash on presents (or you’re just a tight arse who doesn’t want to part with it). We get it. That’s why, if you live in Brisneyland, you’ll be happy to know you can actually collect your order from downtown Woolloongabba and avoid shipping fees. Or why not make a day of it and collect your Kris Kringle gift after a game of cricket at the Gabba? Your mates will revere you even more and secretly wish it’s for them.
4. Who creates your Secret Santa gifts?
We have a talented team of creative (and dirty minded) baboons who work tirelessly on coming up with new and uber funny design ideas. Yes, they’ve got a screw or two loose, but that’s what makes them so awesome!
5. Do you ship internationally?
Oui. Si. Ja. OK that’ll do, you get the drift. The answer is yes! How cool will it be to share some of Australia’s down right dirty humour with your overseas mates and share our spice with the world! Re. the cost, it will depend on the country we are shipping to.